Your Newborn

• I strongly recommend you looking into breastfeeding for your newborn. Most birthing centers have lactation classes and consultants and there are many books on the subject. European mothers breastfeed their babies longer than here in America. The pressure from the corporations to buy this or that supplement here in America is strong but there is nothing, of course, which is as good for your baby as that which nature designed. There have also been social factors which discourage moms from breastfeeding in public. Luckily this seems to be changing and Ro at least had no problems. It is amazingly easy for a discrete mom and baby to feed in public in privacy. They sell bras and tops designed for this and a birthing towel completes the process.
• If you are breastfeeding, you may have to keep your tired little baby up initially. Babies often drop weight after they are born until they learn to latch on to their mom and the feeding process is perfected. Both mom and child need to learn how to connect and it often takes a couple of days for the mom's milk to "come in". Tim was very sleepy when he came out and wouldn't latch on to Ro. A cold wet cloth dabbed on his face or arms worked wonders at keeping him up. My new little niece born last week, on the other hand, seems to be an expert already -- good for her and her mom!
• The second night home, Ro's milk still hadn't come in and Tim was really upset about it. He cried so much and we tried everything (walking, singing, rocking, swaddling, etc.) so we finally had to put him in his crib, close his door, and turn off the monitor to get some sleep. Thankfully he was alive in the morning and Ro's milk came in a couple of hours later. The moral here is to not be afraid if your kid will not sleep to just let him scream it out. You'll need to use your best judgment of course and you need to be careful to make sure that there is not something wrong (wet diaper, hungry, too much light, too hot, too cold, etc.).
• Never underestimate the power of the burp. One of the partner's important jobs after the baby has been feeding is to take the little one from the mother and perform the all important burp. When babies feed they often suck in a lot of air. You'll get very good at putting a towel over your shoulder, to protect from the inevitable drool and the always possible regurgitation, putting the little one's tummy/chest on your shoulder blade with their head/shoulders over the top of your shoulder. Pat them on the back briskly -- use your judgment of course. Little taps won't do anything so you'll need to find the right amount of pressure. In general if you are listening closely, you should almost always gets a burp out of them after a feeding -- some of them would make a trucker blush. If there is any question, keep this up for a good 5-15 minutes to make sure that all of the air is out of your little one. Air can be quite painful and may be the reason your baby is crying, especially if after a feeding.
• Timmy slept in his own crib in his own room across the hall from the very first night. This may not work for you if the mother or the baby have a medical condition, but I highly recommend it. Baby's make a lot of noise as the snuffle and gurgle and chirp. You will get a lot more sleep if you put some distance between you and her/him from the start. It is important for you to be rested so you can deal with the middle of the night feedings and other stresses of a newborn. I promise you that you will hear them cry. Monitors help with this of course. Don't worry, you will have plenty of time to bond, snuggle, and hold your little one but it will not be fun unless you are rested.
• Clipping the nails of a baby can be a very scary activity. A good friend cut his daughters nails too short and they bled for a while. How awful. They sell little tiny clips for baby nails and you will need them. Babies often come out with some serious nails which is why the hospital often has a top which covers their hands less they get scratches on their face before they know enough to stop. Just take your time and maybe have your partner hold the little hand or foot during the operation. Cutting your babies nails are much like pruning a tree -- you can always go back and cut some more off but you can't add if you get too short.
• I have this problem with newborns and socks and feel that a newborn should be barefoot if at all possible. Try to lie on your stomach on the floor and compare traction with socks on versus off. Unless your child is going out and it's cold, skip the socks. Although I have no scientific data on the subject, I feel strongly that babies crawl and walk sooner if their feet are kept bare as much as possible. I don't think that little shoes are a good substitute from the tactile feedback of foot on floor. Now, hard tile or splintery wood is a whole different deal.
• As a followup on the previous entry, be very careful about covering your newborn. Newborns have very little fat on them and they are usually very warm feeling because they transmit heat. This means that they lose heat very easily and need to be kept covered and well insulated. This can be taken to the extreme however since over heating is also an issue. I've seen babies wrapped in so many layers in the winter when they basically only going between the car and the door. The house and the car are both 65+ degrees and if they are wrapped in down and wool, their body temperatures are going to be much hotter than normal. The human internal temperature needs to be kept within a very narrow margin so make sure you cover your newborn a bit more but not tons more than you are covering yourself.
• Remember that newborn babies are all about stimulus and response. You can't argue with them, you can't reason. They aren't trying to make your life hell. At the most they are trying to figure it all out. For this reason, you should never punish a newborn. You will probably get frustrated over your baby's behavior but you cannot change it much aside from feeding, cleaning, drying, warming, etc.. Timmy was a pretty easy baby (you can ask my wife too) but even then there were times where we were at the end of our ropes.

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